Gary Bettman Called a Two Week Break:


10) He wants to get a head start on his Christmas shopping, and wanted to buy himself a new hair piece.

9) He got a discount on two weeks of couple's counselling (one week with Daly, one week with Fehr).

8) When they crossed paths at the pool, Crosby told him to go work on his tan. Gary said Crosby's comment 'cut really deep', so he booked a vacation.

7) He's working on an offer to buy the Phoenix Coyotes with his new partner Jim Balsillie.

6) Gary needs to prep for an upcoming job interview: KHL Commissioner. His goal in life is to make sure Ovie gets locked out no matter where he plays.

5) Gary said he's tired of feeling shorter than Tom Cruise, and needs some time to break in his new pumps.

4) It's not a break, Gary is actually holding out for more money, so the owners locked him out.

3) Gary needs to work on his lines for his upcoming cameo on.........The Muppet Show.

2) He's in hiding from Chris Chelios, Jeremy Roenick, and Luke Skywalker.

1) He's been busy and needed some time to start planning the 2013-2014 NHL lockout.

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Greatest Five to Ever Play:

1)Gretzky
2)Lemieux
3)Orr
4)Howe
5)Messier

Great top 10 list. Funny.

better than letterman... at least you ended with the best one.

11. he is due to give birth to another franchise in Mexico City.
12. wanted to save the gas
13.was busy making appearances to promote the hobbit.
14. he needed to prove that the NHL is the best league in the world, by letting the best players go play in the other leagues.
15. thought he was the commishioner of the KHL
16. needed time to learn russian

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10 team Dyn
tavares rnh statsny
AO benn
kessel malkin
ryan purcell
green letang enstrom kulkov OEL ellis
lundy ward varly bernier lehrner
burmistrov hodgson michalek, ryan oreilly, turris okposo

16 team h2h
Spezza, Tavares
Vanek,doan
malkin, eberle
Doughty Letang, karlsson, weber
hall
green enstrom downie palmeiri kassain bogo
lundy price pavelec

weiters fielder kipnis wright hanley braun upton upton maybin victorino goldschmidt
kershaw, startsburg, greinke, bumgarner, price, neise, bret anderson
valverde, hanrahan, aceves, reed, guerra, storen